“I am an Artist”

I was beginning to wonder if this milestone will ever happen…K finally drew his first discernible face with a pair of eyes, nose, mouth and sometimes hair and usually complete with a pair of stick-like legs.

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For what felt like the longest of time, K was only scribbling, drawing lots of circles and he could never tell me what his drawing was about. The breakthrough finally happened yesterday when he asked for some drawing paper, took his markers, told me, "I am an artist," and then went on to draw more than 10 pages of faces.

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He likes drawing monsters, and the difference is visibly in the large eyes and multiple number of legs.

I had the impression that he had very little interest for art, as he don't seem to enjoy doing colouring and rarely asks for his paints and brushes. However, I think that having an easel in the hall, drawing paper and markers and chalk within reach seemed to have worked quite well in encouraging him to explore some art pursuits. This milestone also happened right after I introduced new chinese activity books filled with dot-to-dot, tracing, and maze activities which helps to train his fine motor skills for writing and drawing. I suppose gaining that slight proficiency in using the pencil/pen really boosted his confidence to start drawing :)

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I am so thrilled that he has reached this milestone. Nevermind that his drawing of me looked unusually vicious and hairy, and had some similarities with his monster drawings 😛

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What do you do when your kid has been pushed by another?

Scenario 1

At K's school, before the kids proceed to the hall for assembly, they will gather at the foyer to wait for the teachers. When we arrive early at 8.15 a.m., Kyle will always meet a group of his schoolmates who come to school by the schoolbus and will mingle with them before the teacher arrives. Being always curious and sociable, he will walk up to some of the older K1 boys who will be comparing their 'Animal Kaiser' cards, and then ask them what types of cards they are looking at, etc. One morning, he approached a K1 boy who didn't take very kindly to his curiousity and questions and was shoved to the side by the latter. K being his persistent self, tried to approach him again and was again pushed by the same boy.

My response : Usually, I stand at a distance to watch how K interacts with his schoolmates, and try not to interfere unless a fight ensues. Thus when I witness the boy pushing K, I gave the boy the fiercest stare that I could muster to let him know that I was watching him. Subsequently when I picked up K from school that morning, I told K to keep away from that boy and not to talk to him at all. 

Dh's response : When dh sent K to school a few days later, he noticed that K did not want to mingle with his school mates who were at the foyer and kept really close to him. When he asked K the reason, K explained that a 'big boy' pushed him and also punched him in the stomach (I wonder when that happened). Dh asked K to demonstrate how the boy punched him, and he got really concerned when K demonstrated a relatively strong punch. When dh got home, he contacted K's class teacher to let her know his concerns and she asked for the boy's name, so that she will be able investigate the details. The next day, when I met her when I was picking K up from school, she assured me that she will try to find out and told me the best will be for K to stay away from that boy.

Until today, we still haven't got the boy's name since we haven't been able to meet the same group of school mates in the foyer in the morning.

 

Scenario 2

Recently at Sunday school, K was recently pushed by a kid in Nursery (Pre-nursery and Nursery kids are in the same class in church) and he fell and hit his mouth on the floor. According to the Sunday School teacher, he bled in his mouth for a while, and by the time we got to pick K up after class, he seemed fine. I checked K's teeth, there was no signs of a potential dislodge, although there was still some bleeding on the gums above his front teeth. I asked K if he felt any pain or discomfort, and his reply was, "Not pain at all."

My response : I brushed it off and told K that he should always wait for his turn and not to push his way to the front. I reminded him that some kids do not like other kids to push their way in front of them or stand too close to them, so he needs to be sensitive to others. I figured the boy probably gave a hard push and K must have lost his balance to have fallen.

Dh's response : When we got to the car ready to leave for lunch, dh saw K's gums and he rushed out of the car. K and I were left in the car waiting for almost half an hour. When he got back, he told me he went back to talk to K's Sunday School teacher, and she went to call the boy's mom (who have already left church by then). The latter and her son made their way back to church and it seems that the boy is usually quite well-behaved in class, and he could have reacted the way he did as he was irritated by K infringing into his personal space.

What I have realised from these experiences, is that there is still lots to be done to help K improve his social behaviour…sigh. 

And dh and I belong to two different ends of the parenting spectrum; he is like the typical male who adopts the 'problem-solving' attitude in all situations, while I am the kind that prefers to 'stay away from trouble' or in this case, stay away from the kid to prevent potential conflict.

It's also clear who is the more protective (kan-cheong) parent, even though I believe dh refuses to admit this as he always says that I mother K too much! :)

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The Age of Persistance

I am amazed by how persistent K can get lately.

Whenever we are at Daiso, K is allowed to buy an item. That day, he made his way to the shelf with all the children's toys and spent a couple of minutes deciding what he wanted. He took up a gun and ask, "Mummy, can I get this gun?" I have been rather insistent to stick to my decision that he will have no more toy guns added to his toy collection, especially since dh enthusiastically bought his first Nerf gun a couple of months back (he lives up to his indulgent daddy role). I told him, "No, no more guns. If you are going to chose a gun, I will walk away." Despite what I said, I watched him turned back to the shelf and he picked up a black gun. He did not even notice me walking away and hiding behind the next aisle. When he turned around to look for me, he noticed that I was no longer behind him and got a little worried. He then started calling for me a couple of times and burst into tears when I did not respond. I ended up letting him have his $2.00 gun and trying to calm him down for the next 10 minutes :(

A couple of days ago, while we were at a mall waiting for dh's turn to get his haircut. Dh (at his indulgent daddy best), decided to let K buy some lollipops from a vending machine. I told dh to wait till after his haircut to buy it for K, as K will have very little self-control, since we did not plan to let him have the lollipop until after his afternoon nap. As expected, K started repeating, "I want to eat…I want, I want…I want," for the whole 15 minutes when dh was getting his haircut. I said no countless of times, while grumbling loudly to dh, "See, it's all your fault. Now he refuse to take No for an answer." I persevere, did not give in, and K only stopped when dh finished his haircut and reprimanded him.

The age of persistance…it is easy to get frustrated and exasperated when faced with these situations, however what may seem to be a challenging trait at this moment, may be that very trait that will help shape my child be that determine adult that perseveres in the face of challenges. I just have to constantly remind myself to take it in my stride and try to curb my over-reaction. 

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